Travelling



Now I know (again) how I like to travle.
I know what I like to do when I travle.
I like to collect seashells and little rocks on the shore.
I like to take pictures with my camera.
I like to sit quietly at a bench or in a bar or maybe inside a cathedral
and write down my thoughts.
That´s how I like to travle.

Feels as though my seven days on Sardinia
were all worth while
just for the sake of coming back home
to my beloved little son!!!!!

No calendar

click to enlarge!

This post is a response to Christianne :-)

See! Here is my planning at the moment!
Usually I do not use our blackboard this way.
At the moment though,
I have a few things too many
to keep them all in my head.

Noak had drawn pretty lines on the blackboard
and I filled dates into different areas;
and wrote things planned into them.

I have never used a calendar successfully.


. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .


A thing I love and that WORKS for me though,
is a book with plain white pages that I use
for thoughts, dreams, plans, to-do-lists, etc...

And every here and there in it
Noak surprises me with his drawings!

Read this too, please :-)

I wish to be a responsable grown-up

...but I often find myself feeling as a helpless child
comfused in this big, complicated world.
Feeling not clever enough
to handle the responsability it takes.

Important to me is not to be a burden to anyone -
and to give of what I have.
If I can keep handeling this,
I will feel responsable enough -
and peaceful.

My fright is money.
(I do never want to take loans)
My money may be all gone in a very short amount of time.
I have no plan for how to get (enough) new money.

Strangely, in the same time I feel peace
that it will be solved.
What have I done to make sure it will be?
(I have prayed and handed it over to God
So God: Please, TELL ME what I am to do !)
I´ld like to be responsable -
But how?????

Today Noak made an bow and arrow.
Today we made pizza.
Today we hung curtains in the livingroom.

Somehow the world keeps spinning...

click to enlarge

Life and Death

Today is the day my aunt was born
many, many years ago...
I will call her a bit later.

My eyes are wet.
My heart is peaceful.

So much life and death.

This month, last year my Father
passed away peacefully at home
with my Mother and my little brother
close to him.

My dear friend in this house has a
new little life growing in her womb!
And I have the honor and joy
to follow her to hospital
to be at her side
and see this little growing life on the monitor
waving its legs and arms
and to see its preacious little heart pump!

(Also in this entrance where we live -
on second floor
is little Emma, Annies newborn sister.
She was borned one week earlier than Ewan...)

There is much life and death now.

My dear Annika lost her Mother
three days ago.
Abby lost her grandmother
and my oldest brother has lost his wife.
Jenny and Josef lost their daughter.

Wenke never came to bed and
in the Sunday morning
my brother found her dead
in the stairs.
This is so sad. So utterly sad.


. . .



I have been praying in agony
for little baby Ewan
(just as so many others have).
A loved child who briefly came to this earth
for his mother and father to hold.
He was here for his parents
to look into his eyes for two weeks.
(I believe he was here for countless good reasons)
Then he closed his eyes,
left his body laying in the arms of his Mother
and went to heaven!

I am greatful to his Mother
for her streangth and kindness
in midst of her pain
that she was able
to share Ewan life and battle
with us at www.team-ewan.com
I just read how she
together with the closest
took farewell of him
and as I cried reading it -
I felt so much peace !


. . .



I will now go to my studio
where a candle is lit for my sister in law
and continue painting the portrait
of a beloved wife
who passed away this spring.

She has a kind, peaceful smile
that will help her man and daughters
always to be greatful for
having been tied together in love.

Dear God, help me understand what is important in life before it is too late!
...and by the way God, is there a "too late?"

Where am I going?


A friend of mine believes I am following my heart
in how I choose to live my life.

I wished I did.

Because somewhere in there -
in my heart
is my whispering God.

Quietly He whispers
a few words of truth and direction
at the time.
I want to hear His whispers
and be sure to follow His directions...

But it is very loud around here!